why do we do what we do in the wild world of weddings? part 1

I am captivated.
I remember being a kid and looking at my parent's wedding album which was a 5x5 slip in with 24 images inside. They also had a few binder pages of slides that were fun to look at, blurry and red but fun to look at. My mom looked gorgeous, young and calm and untroubled. My dad looked so dapper with his platform shoes and full head of dark wavy hair. I remember wishing I could have been there, at the small town restaurant reception, with my parents in their carefree days.
I love weddings and always have even before I ever attended one. The ceremonies, the meanings, the traditions, all fascinate me.  My interest has grown significantly over the years and now I have begun a new chapter this life of mine that revolves around weddings and the hard core investigation has begun. I want to know more. Why do we do what we do? Who decided it should be that way and when? What does it take to become a trendsetter? What does it mean to be modern?
When Bob and I got married, over 8 years ago, we were challenged by the woman who performed our ceremony. She made us dig deep and really understand what our union meant to us. We had to design it start to finish and say what we really needed to say. We incorporated (cue Dar Williams music) Christian AND Pagan traditions, Native American ceremonies, poetry, writings by amazing wordsmiths and truth. It all had significance to us and everyone who attended was involved. That was the last time I really researched matrimony and now I begin again.
I want to share what I learn with others who love weddings. This is another challenge for myself because as I've said before, I am terrible at blogging and sticktoitness... and cleaning my house.
SO... in no particular order of importance or appropriate sequence I am going to write about all the things I find interesting, like hope chests.
As a kid I always heard my grandmom talk about putting things in the hope chest. Today I found out more about what a hope chest really is. We all know that marriages used to be arranged and evolved into something all about love, which is funny to me. The less money people had, the better their chances were for marrying someone they really wanted to be with. The rich folks had to marry whoever their Poppa said they had to marry and hoped it was someone they could stand.
Once women were able to marry for love, they still had to bring something to the table so to speak. Starting at birth, girls would collect pots, towels, dishes, sheets and household items to bring into her marriage. If a girl wanted to marry a man that her father didn't approve of he could withhold her hope chest. Isn't that sad?
This afternoon I read that once a girl wanted to marry a man she absolutely adored. Her father didn't approve so he did not give his blessing and withheld his daughter's hope chest. Her friends protested his disapproval by bringing household items that the bride could use for her new home with her wretched husband. Her dad was so moved that his daughter loved so deeply and that her friends supported her so much that he said "Aw, go ahead and have your damn dowry, good luck to ya" or something like that. HENCE THE BRIDAL SHOWER!!! Thanks girls, way to be there. More tomorrow... I hope.